Good Friend

During my childhood, I was used to keep changing school. The longest kindergarden I stayed for is 1 years. Anyway, kids makes friend quiet easily. Not until I was in primary, I started to realise the gap between individuals. The memories of being alieanated still stay vividly in my mind. Fortunately, my change school  life comes to an end. Do you still remember one of the hot compo question in your primary, My Best Friend. This is one of hardest question I have ever attempt. 

In the past, I did not did well in this kind of easy essay. But can I do it today? Frankly speaking, I still cant identify my best friend is who? Who is she or he? For those who think this kind of question is easy, you should appreciate and dont take your best friend for granted.

During my Junior Middle, friends still are some hard to define terms. Albeit I can easily adpot myself in to a new group, are they really my friends? Or they are just passers-by? Having good friendship is some I would green with envy. Friendship was defined when JM3. Sikeling group is really one of my best group. I really love each and every of them. I very happy when I am with them, but for a boy who born in a very realistic family. I know they are not suitable for me. I cant deny that the precious memories we had. But I cant make myself not to think about my future. My expectation of future are quite different from them. Sorry to walk away from tou since I have my journey to go. On top of that, I did have my constraint. Nevertheless, all of you are deep inside my heart. I love you.

P/S:  For those I did not mention, I love you still, cherish the moment we shared. You know who you are.

星座

我一向都对用星座分析人性有点信心。是否有根据真的不知道。虽然不能诠释一个人，但往往我都会同意星座对我的评语。就犹如刚刚看到的：

巨蟹老公似乎比雙子座更具有雙面個性。

家人与朋友前，就会看到两个我。对着亲人，真的不想让人担心，总得干出一番事业让他们轻松。但我相信在朋友面前我真的是个懒个体。

hm... 现在想想，好像好多人都是如此的吧？但不知为何我还是觉得我是双面的。

The Internal Conflic

Days come and goes

Waited for the day

but still far away

Things change everyday

Waited for the worst to come

but it never be met

Does God like to test us?

When you pray for something

Your offer would be tested

Your determination is challenged

Things never get done easily.

I wonder if it is good or bad.

But the I recall vividly the Junction I were.

The wrong decision I had made

Being emotional...

Today, the same issue arise.

She is applying for some work and training programme

The paradox of love

To let her free or not?

You have to carry out thing 

regardless your hope and your plans.

Things just screw up.

School is back for more than a week. Things are starting to get back on track. The schedule for this semester was quite packed. Most of my clubs are having major event which force me to work harder. A lazy drawl likes me will never get motivated to do something not interested. I wonder how am I going to make those event be successful. 

These days, when I read her blog. Wow, it is like very down and sad. As we both are cancer, I understand her feelings when the whole family are against her dream. I believe her family understand that dreams are important, but they just need time to accept that you have such dream.

Within-expectation-result

Hm.... This result does not seem any better than my past result. I was satisfied with it overall, but I do think it can be much more better by changing the B+ to A+. MAS111 is Calculus1. The exam was moderate. I should say, if you do your homework, you would score 100%. Is that easy.

Nevertheless, I was careless and cost me a lot of marks(around 30%). I should also belief the S (stand for Satisfactory) would be replaced by an A, if i did not S/U it. I done pretty well in that exam. 

The very first day I joined NTU, I aimed for 4.5. I wonder why I seem to yearn for more when I get 4.75. I wish I was not that careless in MAS112. Anyway, I think I deserved better. Laugh out loud. Ironically, the effort i gave in was not proportionate to the result. I belief this might make people envied with green.

Teeth, u have to stand on your own

The yes-days end when it leave me. Lossing them is painful. The merciless dentist removed them as they should not be there. To me, they are healthy and mighty. As the pain get tenser each time, I wonder, why should I remove them? Just because I was told so? Good question ha? Ironically, I was enjoying life before the surgery. 

Luckily, she was caring enuogh to bought me some ice-cream. Although she could not stay for awhile, her warm concern was touching and unforgetable. Muack! I love you my dear. You always know how to comfort me.

Crystal

我们不曾相识。别说谈天，就连打招呼大概也不曾有过。但不知为何，得空时总是会看看她的部落格，了解她的近况。有时看到她在部落格中诉苦发泄，很想给予慰问，但始终没这么做。或许是自卑吧(更重要的是我们不曾相识，对她了解不深，贸然发表不太妥吧？），从内到外，我都没一点配的上成为她的朋友。无论家境，见识，人缘，无一能配的上她。在她面前，我彻底的失败。有时会幻想日后事业有成后，去搭讪她。哈哈，想太远了吧？就只想和她认识，有酱的机会吗？

初三时开始懂得她存在。是因为我当时暗恋的她有时会提到Crystal。那时他们都在“八”她的感情世界。什么郎材女貌，什么分手很可惜。那时开始，她就留下了美好的印象。但话说会来，窈窕淑女君子好求，真的可以用在她身上。她那非凡的样貌，虽称不上倾国倾城，但也是美人一名。她的绯闻也算是有新闻价值，因此不时会听到她的消息。

高二时，瑞琪是我邻居，自然会听到更多的关于Crystal的事咯。同年发现她也是巨蟹座，她生日跟我很近，没记错的话是和刘明华师同日。开始想了解她更多，开始到她的部落格。每当阅读她那流利的英语，都会由心佩服，她的语文能力真的时不可置疑。

自从有了新的手提电脑后，很久都没上她的部落格了，刚刚上去了解了一番。她近来好像蛮开心的，我觉得为她开心。记得上次到那儿时，她好像有好多烦恼，有好多不愉快的事。现在也应该雨过天晴了吧？但现在真的想知道她更多的近况，例如要到那儿念大学，修什么系，等等。

虽然你我没缘相识，但这单方面的关心，我也很满足了，就只想知道你当下会开心，以后会幸福。

暗友笔